Verves In Composition

If you think that this would be a post with photographic illustrations of my exes, that’s where you’re wrong. However it wouldn’t be straying from that point either.

An afternoon spent rasping the darkest indentations of storage boxes, cupboards and pulling up drawers from their suspended supports I humbly stumbled across scattered sheets of postcard-sized findings.

Coated with a thick folio of unwanted particles that have housed themselves on it, the dust suggested that it has been lying there for at least the last couple of months,-One, Two years, perhaps; since I’ve last conversed with regards to cleaning that area.

Wiping the coat of dirt off them I uncover that of a face which I’ve not seen for close to three years now. The face of an ex boyfriend.

What grasped me is that I was digesting that I would always think that an face that brought back unpleasant memories would resurface.

My over active imagination would usually see me draft out images in my mind of using that photo as a cross bow target practice, hammering the piece into a photographic pulp with the heavy end of a clog shoe with my voodoo language of my mother tongue. Yes I’d even thought of making posters out of it, with a large display of a very relevant phone number next to the caption ‘LOOKING FOR A GOOD TIME?’

Phew. I’ve just come back from a special dance choreography for Valentines Day. It was something that most of us in the class can put to good use since a number of the ladies in the class had a special someone.

I come home, incredibly contented with today’s class making mental notes to practice my moves to show off at the next event I’m set to dance in. I gaily log in to my IMs to switch my nickname and flank it between icons of hearts because of the Valentine’s day special. I couldn’t wipe that sickening glee all over my face until I scrolled down my list to check who was online.

A myriad of blasphemy and vexation dedicated to the 14th of February have been plastered (some emphasized in Caps) to the nicknames of several friends.Some were guys but amongst them were my other girls who hiss like Medusa’s hydras at the very existence of Valentines day. To them, the cherubs look like stunted fat kids holding weaponry, bouquets will eventually wither and die, and they’d sneer and mock at every couple in amour.

I made several attempts to set some sights in a pleasing direction, I was not going to let a day named after saints and fertility festivals of early civilisation ruin a perfectly good 24 hours (or more) of someone’s life.

Now it wouldn’t make sense for me to send this post out as a guide if I weren’t single myself hmm? Being what I’m about to write about makes the guide a…much more feasible one *winks*

If there is one rule I will live by it’s

Love yourself and you will become lovable

And if there is anything I’m really good at myself, is being a narcissist. Some of you would find me quite endearing by the end of the post
Spoil yourself.

Take this as an excellent time for a makeover for YOURSELF. I’d head down to my favourite Salon and tell my stylist to do go crazy to make me feel gorgeous, I go down to every nail parlor and test out 10 different colours on my finger nails just to get the right shade. There is really nothing more appealing than a girl who feels confident with herself. A girl made that way (and especially if she took the effort to do it by herself) will naturally flaunt it in attractive fashion. I personally plan to come out with a new hair do soon

Silence noisy relatives.

Typical of the Asian Society to have family that just irritate you with the same question over and over again. This time, snicker and sneer at relatives who jeer at you for being single. My personal favourites are “I discovered my lesbian side”, “I can’t seem to find a man with more balls big enough to fit in my hand that’s good enough.” and “I can do whatever I want without reporting to another..can you?” They’ll get the picture. Trust me.

Celebrate Freedom

Relationships are hard work. Celebrate the fact that you’re not committed to someone that you can jump in your own bed of roses. You can do whatever you want, not wasting your time to compromise to where you go for dinner, you don’t have to worry your head out to make sure that everything is ok with another; And just be that beautiful butterfly you are free and without much of a care in just a shirt and a pair of your favourite worn out jeans.

Be INCREDIBLY THANKFUL

Be thankful that you don’t have to spend the evening stuck in a horrid jam (Especially since it’s a working day and the massive KL jam). Be thankful that you don’t have to be potentially cheated by restaurants who are out to kill you that night. Be thankful that you don’t have to spend money on a man. Be thankful that if it was just your luck to receive an awful gift it wouldn’t affect you. Be thankful that you can wear shorts and still not give a damn because you had not have enough time to shave your legs that day. Be thankful you don’t have to stand another hour of dreaded contact lens in your eyes just to look less nerdy to a man. Best of all, BE FREAKING THANKFUL YOU DON’T HAVE TO STRESS YOURSELF UP IF HE DOESN’T PERFORM THAT DAY.

I don’t need a man

Definitely don’t need one to put a smile on my face. I’ve got so many girlfriends, I may just hit the clubs that night with hot single women. Then again I may be tempted to a valentines day gift exchange spree with my closest girlfriends, maybe go shopping and trade compliments on how good we look whilst we try on the latest spring lingerie.

Looking forward to so many firsts

Romance can develop later. I’m really interested in putting myself first, Why tie yourself down when you can make your firsts in the best of situations? Some of the best things aren’t planned. Don’t rush that first kiss, first relationship, first hug, first pillow fight. Me? I’m looking for my first hilarious pick up line at the mamak.

Learn to be happy for others

For my friends who are attached, I indulge in their joy as well, because what makes them happy, seeing them so blissful makes me happy myself. I’ve learnt to be happy for those who are fortunate enough to find someone so kind. Hatred only begets to the darkside

Try to stay in

Living in the Klang Valley, I would prefer to escape all the mayhem that night. I’d rather sit down to watch Romy and Michelle’s High School Reunion, go to the nearest Starbucks to blog or have fun cooking up a storm in the kitchen with friends. Maybe I’ll tah pau Yong Tau Foo. No point going out when everything you do is just going to burn a hole in your wallet or just give you further stress.

Post Valentine day treats…

ON CHOCOLATES! GO SPEND THAT MONEY ON REALLY GOOD DISCOUNTED CHOCOLATES!!!! *CHEERS AND THROWS CONFFETTI IN THE AIR!*

All right, I may have made one or two snide remarks and laughing at people who are succumbing to the overpriced hi-jinx of clever marketing tactics, However;On a very personal note, I feel that it is completely bloody averse to bottle all the love and sincerity for care into one day. Commercialised? Yes. Then again with the waves of flowers, origami, pink and red stationary how can a girl ignore it? I celebrate it myself. But in my own manner or flavoured with a dash of cynicism and a pinch of sarcasm. I should stop writing or I’ll further deface the day when a Saint was Killed!

I’d just make the best of it Now, where did I put my favourite camwhoring camera?

I’m going to have to start repairing my shoes if I’m going to attain at least the literal part of the sentence….

Best foot forward.

What a way to start the new year, sorting out my heels and pumps so I can wear more of them.

I’m really lucky to be able to afford so many nice shoes.. and yet…
Urgh. Unfortunately, all my heels have really noisy effects after some wear and tear. The rubber just gives way and thus exposing the screw or metal part or whatever it is that makes my presence know when I walk down the stairs.

It’s unfortunate that one of the local heavily franchised stores famous for shoes (Yes we all probably know which store already since they have an outlet in every major shopping mall in the country) have really nice shoes but really LOUSY RUBBER ATTACHED TO THE HEELS. If any fellow company representatives of that store knows what I am talking about, please go do something about the rubber on the heels. You probably would even recognize some of your designs in the first photo.

I’ve got at least a dozen shoes to take to the cobbler when business resumes after the new year slog.

Does anyone know how much it will cost to just replace the rubber part?

Everyone in the blogosphere probably knows by now that my good friend minishorts is getting hitched soon I’m really excited for her and to be involved in her wedding plans! 

So there is this woman planning and budgeting and she is upset with how much flowers can cost. Through such conversations. We have very much concluded …

Minishorts: i’m not going to throw it because stupid malaysian women jump away when they throw it
i been to 5 weddings with throwing bouquet
NO NEED lah sampat only throw the bouquet

April: EH! THROW AT ME!!!!
i catch one. hahahaha

minishorts: YOU SAMPAT i give you lah after that 
i kid you not
the bouquet is the most useless accessory a bride has
dunno who last time say have to do very big now you know why i say overprice ..stupid corsages are a waste of money

FLOWERS ARE DAMN EXPENSIVE THINGS AND USELESS.

but what to do? nice mah…

Hillarious. Anyway, back to bouquet catching.

The last time I stood in the crowd of fighting young single women. Being tall obviously I stood in the back. I looked down on my feet. 

I heard screams and I looked up. If it were’nt a bouquet of flowers, I would have broken my nose. Well..looks like I’m going to catch the bouquet without even putting up a fight. I’m going to be given the bouquet. The first bouquet must be a hoax…not married yet also. :p

I happen to come from a female-almost-militant-style school. A school where each and every girl was drilled with the absolute necessity to excel. We were considered tragic if we were only involved in one extra curricular club, labeled unambitious if we didn’t participate in any competitions, and we tend to scowl at the girls who had more than a lock of floppy fringe not pinned in place…. a creme de la creme school of smart bright women.

It doesn’t stop there. A humongous percentage of us look good, but we try to ground ourselves to humble land when we carry ourselves

In our pinafore strapping days, we were the Stepford wives and trophy women for the men who dated us then. highly prized, eagerly coveted, and wistfully sought after.

So in theoretical quintessence, all girls should be arm in arm with a strapping good chap now.Right?Right?
RIGHT?

Sitting on a table of random girls from my school. Most of us have not seen each other for these mere 6 years of our lives. We go on happy with our secure jobs in big firms, our plans to invest in long-term assets, our skincare regime. Until…
“So what’s your story?”

“Single.”

“Single.”

“Single.”

*deathly silence*

SSZ then mentions the ice breaker. “It could be just the ladies from our school. But men JUST AREN’T GOOD ENOUGH THESE DAYS”

The gist of the discussion would end up with all of us not being able to put up with the crap that most girls can take. Men just can’t stand up to the challenge we pose anymore. (And hear this, we are not won over when we agree to have a relationship with you, you will have to win us over everyday for the rest of our lives)

I don’t know about the rest of the girls,

BUT I REALLY CANNOT TAKE MEN WHO MOAN AND GROAN OVER SMALL MATTERS, MEN WHO ARE STILL CHEMICALLY BOUND TO THEIR MOTHER’S APRON STRINGS, MEN WHO HAVE NO DRIVE IN LIFE, MEN WHO GIVE UP SO EASILY, MEN WHO DON’T THINK BEFORE THEY TALK, AND A MAN WHO CAN’T STAND UP FOR HIMSELF WHEN A WOMAN IS INTIMIDATING HIM.

Goddamit. BE A MAN for crying out loud.

I don’t care what’s your high score in DOTA, I don’t wanna know how big your schlong is unless it’s going to earn you a a billion bucks each time it gets photographed. Don’t explain to me you’re looking for yourself by switching courses and directions. If you wanna pretend that you know something I know, don’t go and cut and paste it out from wikipedia.

I don’t mind an ego, as long as you present the license to brag.

Then there are great, good men, men with equally impressive or more superior qualities..who are easily taken away by easy women. (Thus, it does tell us that such men are not worth the time)

MOMMIES & DADDIES, TEACHERS, MENTORS AND ANYONE RAISING A BOY PLEASE TAKE NOTE!!! WOMEN NEED MORE QUALIFIED MEN! (Being utterly overdramatic her already…)
Thank you my alma mater for giving us the ability to stand strong, but I wish it didn’t come with an overpowering ego -_- So great, I have a really great filter, but nothing seems to be coming out of it…. YET.

I wonder if I really should be thankful. Or should I muck around in self-defeat…

Bah, I’ll prolly go put on that new killer dress I bought and strut around looking good whilst shopping for the next analytical book on my list. What a way to start blogging again after a long hiatus

Current Weight: 62.5kg

Current Dress size: 10

Day 1 meal

B: 1 tub of Yoghurt Berry Flavoured           137kcal    4gs fat

L:Smoked Norwegian Salmon in                  210kcal    6gs fat
Panini bread with a side of
Almond Salad

D: Smoked Norwegian Salmon                    210kcal    6gs fat
strips with Low fat dressing
in Caesar’s salad

TOTAL CONSUMPTION                           557kcal   14g fat

Day 2

B:45gs Uncle Toby’s “Plus Fibre Mix“          185kcal    5g of fat

with Low fat Natural Yoghurt

Snack: 1 small banana                              80kcal      2G fat

L: Half a can of Campbells Cream              100kcal      3g fat
of chicken soup

Snack: Orange Juice                                 121kcal     2G fat

D: Smoked Norwegian Salmon                   210kcal     6g fat
strips with Low fat dressing
in Caesar’s salad

TOTAL CONSUMPTION                           696kcal   13g fat
Day 3

B: 1 tub of Yoghurt Berry Flavoured            137kcal           4g fat

Snack: Half a can of Campbells Cream          100kcal           3g fat
of chicken soup

L: Smoked Norwegian Salmon                     210kcal           6g fat
strips with Low fat dressing
in Caesar’s salad

Snack: Soy Bean milk                                   87kcal           1g fat

D: Smoked Norwegian Salmon                     210kcal           6g fat
strips with Low fat dressing
in Caesar’s salad
TOTAL CONSUMPTION                           744kcal        20g fat

So far so good hehehe

Day No: 0
Current weight: 63kgs

Current dress size: 10
Hello everyone, I’m so ready to lose weight again After two years of putting back on all that fat, it’s time to clean out my system again and start looking fresher and better!

I’ll be blogging this on a daily basis to help me monitor my progress and you can drop me comments for support too! YAY!

I’ve gone through all the necessary preparations. A tote bag with all the essentials:

1) Scoop spoon for mixing my favourite detox drink by Melilea (i shall blog about it soon on Practical Charm)

2) A muesli bar for snacking

3) A fork for my packed salads

4) My ever so essential thermos

5) Tea bags to flavour my drinks

6) Equal, aspartamine, to sweeten my drinks

For one whole month, I will be converting my sweet tooth, carnivorous, dairy loaded diet into one comprising mostly of

1) Salads - Fresh Romaines, rockets, tomatoes, corals, butterheads, ice-berg lettuce and cucumbers with lightly toasted wholemeal non-buttered croutons and light Caesar dressing. Important to note that there will be no servings of cheese, mayonnaise or thousand island with my salads

2) Halved cans of Campbells chicken soup to be eaten sparingly max twice a week

3) Bottles and bottles of yoghurt! - to be eaten once daily on a sparing basis

4) Fresh fish and white meat: Smoked salmon, sashimi servings, cod, tuna in water all not to be fried, stir fried or steamed with any sort of oil.

5) Whole grains no breads or baked goods: Yeap. not even a slice of bread!

6) Fruits and juices: Non sweetened preferably citrus juices and Watermelons!

I should be updating in another 24 hrs!

Wish me luck!

As much as I love and care for all the men in my life, It has never quite gotten to me that I have sacrificed enough to be a walking excuse machine.

Being only human I suppose, it is completely instinctive for a woman to stand by her man’s side… as we would expect them to do for us. The matter of fact is,

“You sick what, why isn’t your boyfriend coming to see you?”

“Maybe he busy larh hor? Cannot expect him to come now also what”

“He’s only bloody 20km away. God dammit, if he really cares about you, a wrecked train that exploded and frightened stampeding buffalos with hot pokers sticking out of their asses won’t stop him from reaching to see if you are alright.”

It’s quite pathetic if you think of it, that smart, intelligent, capable women are all making excuses for the man. Why do we do it?

Part of my judgment whispers to me that we would always want to believe that the man we share lives with (although with an imperfect set of traits) are coupled with good intentions. Because we like the dude so god damn much that we want to rough it out.

Part of me does not want to sound like a demanding bitch. Because they’re so busy, they’re loaded with work, they’re under pressure gives them every right in the world to be “Mr.Without-Me-The-World-Will-Not-Function”.

We just want them to treat us the way we treat them? Right?

Sweethearts, you’re hopelessly hopeful,… unfortunately a majority of them are not hopeless enough.

Yes, it makes perfect common sense, that you deserve that bit of extension of effort. BECAUSE IT REALLY MATTERS TO YOU WOULD DO EXACTLY THE SAME. Now STOP MAKING EXCUSES for men have to rely on a woman to fend you. You’re only making excuses for yourself.
Damn. I feel so empowered. BWAHAHAHA.

I’ve heard of ladies demanding for the a minimal carat size if a man ever wants to set his marital dreams on her, but this is absolutely RIDICULOUS.

If i did mention that “I would love a total diamond collection amounting to this.” I swear 80% of men will be so put off XD

Nah I don’t want that many diamonds. Or people will be going round chopping my Arm off!

Btw, found this at my new supplier’s shop for Korean Crystal imports! Have you seen my latest designs at Vanity Vault?

My BFF just got a bunch of flowers in the office on her birthday. Somehow this guy that we strongly believes that he is infatuated with her for God-knows-how-long (although he denies it) made sure she got it IN HER OFFICE.

Although she has made it very clear on many occasions that she feels no ’spark’ and that even as friends she would not like to receive flowers for her birthday from him… she still got flowers.

Embarassed by the stares and curious questions of an entire floor of colleagues she tucks the bouquet under her desk.

The first bouquet in her life….