Choices I’m left with to find a man.

This Chinese New Year must be very special cause I seem to have a big “BOYFRIEND-LESS ” sign with blinking 50 watt bulbs dancing in sync to a merciless repetitive banjo tune.

Every aunt must wish me that “I hope you will land a big nice man!” Or something along those lines… And then I take it to the home front,..

So there I am on the bed talking to my little sister;…tormenting her with questions on what if and toying with the possibilities for myself.

“So what if I told you I was dating an ex-convict or a drug dealer?”

“I wouldn’t be surprised”

She’s actually not the least bit bothered cause its not her.

“So what if I dated someone who’s not of the religion we were brought up with?”

“Its up to you if you want to give up certain meats or all meats or if you wanna dedicate a day in every week to your new found religion”

Obviously she’s not bothered again..

“What happens if I were walking hand in hand with a dude who smokes a whole packet of Malboro Reds a day?”

“I’d kill you and wonder how’d you stoop down so low till you have to date a smoker”

AH.. now I’ve got her attention

Thats my sister, a bit of a prejudice towards people who smoke (because she’s allergic to second hand smoke) and she doesn’t mind mentioning it to their faces. Me, I think smoking is a lifestyle choice, a choice that I wouldn’t follow but if people want to it’s cool with me.

And speaking of choices. It’s quite bad if I have to respect my sister choices and totally slash out the percentage of potential bachelors because they are smokers wouldn’t it? (Although it will help in zeroing down on an ideal man)

I know my own family is terrified of me hooking up with someone of different backgrounds. My own girlfriends and I ponder over it over many rounds of coffee.

It isn’t like the old days anymore where you should be happy that your daughter is at least in the most minimal of pursuit. Must have been so bad last time that they had to bind your feet or create a marketing strategy to promote you or whatever it is they do.

Today it’s
“What is he doing?”
“Where did he study?”
“Where are his parents from?”
“What car does he drive?”
“Which church does he go to?”
“Why does he do that?”
“Why does he laugh with a snort in the wind ?”
“How come his fart stinks so much?”

THINGS THAT I DON’T EVEN BOTHER TO KNOW THESE PEOPLE WANT TO KNOW.

Whatever happened to ‘as long as you are happy, we’re happy’?????

Me. I just like to keep everyone happy. Like every child I would love to have my members of the family accept my other half with open arms for who he is and what he did and what he does.

I rather have it that way than have family members constantly poking and jostling his back. If they were treating him like shit, I’d feel like I’m wallowing in shit. I’d feel most uncomfortable with having to juggle between two sides which I love very much.

And thus in my current singlehood, Every fish good looking, good natured and good-whats-not will have to be weighed on scales which tip on and off each side with billowing voices of opinion. Bloody hell. Decisions decisions.

And let me tell you that it’s no fun to keep not only your checklist but you have to keep OTHER PEOPLES checklist as well.

If possible, for once I’d like to make a decision to choose who I will without having a biased view or any sort of interference.

Thus, I am not letting my sister make my choices for me. Period. Ah but lets see what kind of fish swims by. So anchovy, octopus, giant squid, whale, turtles from across the Pacific Ocean or the smallest mollusk, I’d give everything a go! Even if it were a shark, sharks fin soup is always a welcome.”

No mom, please no lectures after this. I know what I’m doing. And yes your girl IS NOT DATING ANYONE.

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7 Responses to “Choices I’m left with to find a man.”


  1. Hey April!!!
    Thanks so much for taking out the time to meet me. Your explainations have been a great help. And you make killer earrings!!

    Don’t worry, you’ll find someone who knocks your (and everyone else’s) socks off.
    =)


  2. Hye Ka Mun,

    It was a great pleasure to meet you :) I look forward to meeting you again should you need any more advancement or if you decide to to take up the hobby as well!

    I sure hope so! I’m not looking for anything spectacular, just someone great :) But I’m not going to LOOK at the pace I’m going :P

    Hope sometimes people will try to see things our way :)

  3. Chris

    hahaha…anchovy, octopus, giant squid, whale from pacific ocean? how fishes bout from laut cina selatan?


  4. *kekeke*
    My mother freaked out initially when she realised that I was dating an Indian boy.

    But now she’s resigned to the as-long-as-you’re-happy stand.


  5. Chris: I’d deal with ANY fish, as long its a good catch :)

    Maggie: Hmm, I doubt my parents especially my dad will ever tone down to that stage. But i really hope that he would if anything like that happens


  6. My mother was crazy about all the wrong guys and trusted the ones she shouldn’t have trusted at all. It wasn’t until I was in my 40s that we both agreed on someone. I’ve been with him nearly ten years. Honestly, I think the reason she liked him so much is because she saw that he treats me well and I’m blissfully happy. Most people don’t have to wait until their 40s. I wasted half my life on drugs … but that’s another story.

    Hang in there. Happiness will find you. Right now you and he are becoming what will ultimately make you perfect for one another.


  7. we DO have a giant squid in the blogosphere, in case you didn’t know. need my intro?

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